Dead

Too tired to feel,
Too numb to care.
Empty, lifeless, dead inside,
My frozen mask barricades my heart.
A smile, a laugh escapes my lips
Yet I don't feel it, not one bit.
It might be a good thing,
I don't have to feel the pain.
My body feels hollow,
Yet thoughts and voices ricochet through my mind,
I am forced to swallow
The venom in those lies.

My pen scratches the paper,
My emotions I draw.
Bloody and dark, creepy yet true,
My fear, my anger, my pain slips through.
It glides down my hand, my pen the paper;
It holds the key to a darker part of me.
Emotions I locked up for way too long,
Crumbles down on me
My mask has begun to fall.
Faith I've lost, trust- it's broken,
God won't save me, angels don't exist.

Numbness creeps into my dying heart,
Slowly settling into this realm so dark.
Anesthetic flows straight through my veins,
Dead and empty, it falls down like rain.
I don't want to feel, I don't want to care,
It'll be like I'm just not there.
My body is just an empty vessel,
My broken soul has left me,
My emotions a dark tunnel.

I am dead.